Chemo Treat #2 Day 11

Wow.. it's been a while since I posted an update. Okay let's see if I can remember everything. Day 2 through 5 were my bad days, Sunday, day 4 being the worst. Did not escape getting sick this time, but believe it was due to my continuous problem with regular bowel movements. Day 5 I started getting better and by day 6 was bright and cheery again. Went to work on Friday day 2 which I now feel was a mistake. Will take the Friday after chemo off from now on as I feel I was pushing it way too much. All things considered though everything went smoothly Thank God. Now I can say I made it through the 2nd treatment and waiting for the third to approach. My Neuropathy seems to have gotten worse this go around. Cannot feel my right thumb at all and entire hand feels like it's asleep. The Neuropathy in my other hand and feet has seemed to slowly fade, but still feel tingling from time to time. Will ask the Doc about this on our next visit as he seemed pretty concerned the last time we spoke about it. I think my biggest issue so far has got to be the constipation. Cannot seem to find the right cure for that yet. I try to eat all the right things, drink water, exercise, but nothing yet.. hope to find out what works soon. Going back to work has been great. My biggest fear there of course is getting sick. With my immune system so low it would be very easy for me to pick up a bug and it always seems like someone there is sick. We are taking as many precautions as allowed so hopefully I will stay sick free. Work has been so supportive. I truly am blessed to have my job and the people I work for and with. They have all been great about everything. Received a nice surprise on day 1 after chemo..came home to find the most beautiful bouquet of flowers had been delivered from two of my old vendors I used to work with. It was such a sweet surprise and I am still enjoying the flowers today. Mom and Dad came to visit on Saturday day 3. We had a great time and I got to give my Daddy a great big Birthday hug. This weekend Mom and my Sis Lori came to eat breakfast with me and shop lil bit.. had a great time, which reminds me...did I tell you that my sister Leigh works with me, but in different department and is always right there to watch over me? She has been so great. On Friday day 2 she drove me to work and helped me get through the day. It was not easy and feel quite sure I could not have done it without her. I know I say this a lot, but I truly have so many blessings!!!!! It is so crazy how many people I have helping me get through all of this. I was searching the web the other day and found this site for Ovarian Cancer....at first glance it looked like I had found a forum in which everyone was experiencing the same things I am and it felt good to not feel so alone, but after some reading and further research I realized that some things are better left unknown.I thought I was strong enough to handle any information I could about this disease, but realized very quickly that maybe I was not as strong as I thought. I feel now that I know the things I need to know and will worry about the rest later. I did learn some good things though as well... it is important that I know it is ok to have bad days.. its ok to feel what comes my way good or bad. It is important that I not try so hard to put on the happy face if there isn't one.. I know this now and will try my best to embrace the bad days and bad feelings as well as the good..Even with all I know now I feel in my heart that it's important to live for today and worry about tomorrow then so that's what I intend to do. I know that some days will be easier than others..but with God and the support of my friends and family I can do this. Am I scared??? Oh yes most definitely! Do I wonder what my future holds???? Every minute of every day!!!!! Do I have faith that God will see me through???? Beyond a shadow of a doubt!!!! Will I do all I can to beat this thing we call cancer?????? You bet your booty I will!!!!! Because my storm now knows how big my God is and I can only imagine that the "Big C" is running like crazy!!!!! I will end this now, but first I would like to share a little poem I found with you. If I have learned anything at all in this life it is that I am responsible for my own happiness and that the things that happen to us in our life only have as much power as we allow... I will not empower nor allow this cancer to lead me.. that is God's place and with him I am safe and at peace.. Thank you God as you take my hand and lead me through this valley... I love you all and hope to update you again soon.

"What Cancer Cannot Do"
Cancer is so limited...
It cannot cripple love.
It cannot shatter hope.
It cannot corrode faith.
It cannot eat away peace.
It cannot destroy confidence.
It cannot kill friendship.
It cannot shut out memories.
It cannot quench the spirit.
It cannot silence courage.
It cannot reduce eternal life